It's Friday night and your restaurant is packed. Two servers called in sick and you are trying to turn a few more tables to make room for a large group that just walked in the door, without a reservation. Then you hear the words that make any restaurateur's skin crawl, "I want to talk to the owner, now!"
When dealing with an angry customer, you have to keep your cool. But it's hard to stay calm when they are yelling for everyone in the restaurant to hear. It would be easier to ask them to leave or tell them to "stick it where the sun don't shine." And it would sure make you feel better, right?
Don't do it.
Instead, put yourself in their shoes. Why are they so upset? Right or wrong, dealing with an unhappy customer is your opportunity to learn more about your customer. Their feedback may help you make subtle changes to increase all your customers' dining experience.
The ideal time to diffuse a bad situation is when it is happening. And if you don't, they will tell an average of 12 friends about the poor customer service they received at your establishment. They may also post and tweet to hundreds more of their online friends - and their friends' friends - about the poor service they received. Poor reviews on Yelp, TripAdvisor, and Google+ last for a lifetime, so it's best not to let the issue escalate.
The LAIR method is an easy to remember technique to help you and your staff resolve conflicts.
LAIR - Listen. Acknowledge. Identify. Respond.
1. Listen
Never make excuses or argue with a customer. This will make them more angry. By making excuses, you are not listening to them. If you don't listen, how can they be heard? Most people concentrate on what they are going to say next rather than listening to the other person. By actively listening, the customer will know you care and may reveal more valuable information than the actual issue at hand.
2. Acknowledge
This works quite well in disarming a potentially tricky situation. But make sure to acknowledge their concern without being defensive. Defending your policy, employee, or menu suggests that they are wrong to be angry. Nodding your head in agreement, or simply looking into the customer's eyes and saying, "I understand. Thank you for bringing this to my attention," will likely calm them down. Note - you don't have to agree with them, you are simply acknowledging their feelings and the issue at hand.
3. Identify
Ask open-ended questions to understand the complete situation. Asking questions will put you on their side. You will no longer be an adversary, but a friend wanting to know more about the situation. Use the information you have gathered by listening and paraphrase their concern back to them. This assures them that you fully understand the issue and prevents misunderstandings caused by assumptions on either side. Using words like, "What I hear you saying is...you are upset that Molly didn't seat your party until they all arrived. Is that correct?"
4. Respond
Sometimes the best way to deal with an angry customer is to simply apologize and offer a reasonable solution. "I'm so sorry you had to wait in the lobby until your party arrived. We really appreciate your patience. Would you like to wait in the bar or patio instead?" And if the problem is truly your fault (lost reservation, grumpy server, cold food), offer some form of compensation like a free dessert, appetizer, or even a t-shirt...you know, the one with your logo on it.
And on the rare occasion when you have a customer that cannot be consoled or is being unreasonable, know that sometimes there is nothing you can do to change their mind. Sincerely apologize and let them know you would love to see them again. You never know, they could return and become one of your best customers.